Just say it..

I never had wanted to blog about something like this. I usually tend to keep the blog family oriented with fun things we do. But I hope to keep this blog going and maybe someday publish it for our kids to enjoy when they are older. I just know that the longer I blog the more work it will be to get it printed.  There are things I never want forgotten, even if it's good news or bad news. 

A couple months ago, my Mom passed out at work and nearly broke her food. As it ended up turning out, she had very low blood pressure. For the next 2 months after the incident they were trying to figure out what in the world is causing the low blood pressure and her passing out. This is to begin a long drawn out process. It seemed like she just continued to get worse. She is always tired to the point where she can hardly hold her eyes open, she was always cold even to the touch she would be freezing. On Easter, she appeared pasty and pale almost like  a corpse. She became repetitive in what she says, telling me the same thing over and over each time we spoke, sometimes a couple times in one conversation. She got a call that she has a bad thyroid ( This was before Easter) . Not great, but at least we had an answer to maybe some of the things that have been going on. First challenge is medicating a gastric bypass patient. Easter was when I became more alarmed, her appearance was awful. 

It was a week or 2 after Easter when she got the call that she has Hashimoto's disease. Even more thrilled to have an answer, now we wait until June to see the specialist. Frightening considering she has passed out, our fear is her passing out while driving. We won't have more on this until sometime in June.

As if she has not had enough...

Some time last year ( might not even of been that long ago) , my mom had a Mammogram. The end result was they think there is something there, they just can't see it. In the mean time, since that mammogram, my Mom has lost over 100lbs. They requested another mammogram. My mom had since changed insurance, but of course that should not matter, she still has coverage.

When going to get the second mammogram done, the lady told my Mom that they were not able to do the mammogram, as it had to be done on the exact machine it was done on previously. Well, having changed insurance, the mammogram would not be covered at the previous office because she no longer has that insurance. On a recent Dr. Apt. my Mom's Dr. asked her what was going on with it, and she explained what had happened. My mom's Dr. found this unacceptable ( thank god ) and by the time my Mom got out to her car, her Dr. called her and had scheduled a mammogram for her. She told my Mom to get it done, and if the insurance denies the claim, they will cover it. About 2 weeks ago she had the mammogram and a few days after, it was confirmed that my Mom has Breast Cancer. There are just no words...

In addition to my only daily struggles I have been trying to come to terms with all of this. I have been going through a lot with Andrew lately and it has been emotionally draining. 

Daily, t has been emotional. My Mom needs us more than ever know, and it brings tears to my eyes to see how scared she is. She is so vulnerable and speaks of death as if she is already there.

It has been a painful couple weeks, and I am not sure we are ready for what could potentially be in store. At this time she is scheduled to see a specialist for the Hashimoto's disease and is waiting a biopsy for the breast cancer. At which point we hope to have more answers. The stage, has it spread, ect.

Since I have started this post, I have returned to it after a few days. I mentioned the fear of something happening why she is driving. This is what made me finish this post. Because I think by me posting it, marks that I am ready to deal with it. And I need to do that.

Today...

My Mom was feeling ill at work. And instead of coming to my house as planned, she decided to drive home. While driving home, She ran 2 stop signs and ran 2 people off the road. One of the people she ran off the road, called and reported my Mom's car as a possible reckless drunk driver. This person kindly followed my Mom in fear of her crashing, and wanted to make sure she had immediate help if this happen. As awful but incorrect as this is, I thank the lord for that person that did this. I can only imagine what could of happen if they had just let her go.

By the time she got more into town, the cops were surrounding a 4 way intersection waiting for my Mom's car. Of course she was pulled over, and it was quickly discovered, my Mom was not drunk, but ill, very very ill. At this stage my Mom looks very ill in appearance, frail and weak. Thankfully my Mom carries all the paper work about her medical conditions. The cops were so compassionate toward my Mom and wanted to just get her home safely. My Dad left work to go get her and they officers expressed sincere apologies for what she is going through to my Dad. 

Unfortunately, my Mom's driving privileges had been temporarily suspended, which I am also grateful for. She could hurt someone and herself, and until she in under the care of a specialist, she should not be driving.